A letter to the girl.

To the innocent youth of the 5 year old skater girl.

To the confused 7 year old girl, 

perched on her bed, 

wondering if they had gotten it wrong.

To the playful 9 year old girl, 

bursting with excitement when scoring the winning goal.

To the distressed 10 year old girl, 

embarrassed and ashamed when they said she couldn't play.

To the overwhelmed 12 year old girl, 

venturing into new surroundings and unfamiliarity's. 

To the drunk 14 year old girl, 

dressed in black, picking product from her glazed eyes. 

Crying, frightened, unsure she is. 

To the once innocent 16 year old girl,

Lying on a bed, staring at the roof. 

Hangover sinking, come down dawning.

To the lying 18 year old, 

trying desperately to conform. 

Trying desperately to look her up most. 

Trying desperately to impress. 

Falling over 6inches every weekend. 

Indulging on fake things she never truly wanted. 

Lying, hiding, desperately escaping. 

To the determined 19 year old. 

Who found herself through the darkness. 

Who felt her love for the first time.
Who embraces every moment. 

Who over came her fears and jumped higher than she ever had. 

Who destroyed all expectations. 

Who came to the realisation of who she was. 

Why she was once confused, distressed, drunk, lying. 

Who stopped pretending and started living.

Welcome to the world. 

Roam freely.

Where will you be, when you're absolutely free?

The months end as new ones begin, rolling together like waves crashing against the sand, and I can't help thinking 'is time really going this fast?'. I am struggling to keep up. Struggling to digest the concept of time. Struggling to break free.

From January until now I have been riding the roller coaster of life. Leaving a much loved job, travelling some of Europe, working and backpacking around America, chucking 19 years of my life into brown boxes and moving to pursue my dreams, falling back into education with an earth quaking bang, cutting my hair and saying peace out, or fuck you, to my former self. Realising how short, how magical, how beautiful life can be when we free ourselves and look closely.

Recently I was struck with a gut wrenching fear. What if I wake up one day regretting not following my thoughts? What if, by the time I have come to this realisation, I am too old to conquer all that could have been. A life wasted on waiting. On procrastinating. On just dreaming, not doing.

So in that moment I made a vouch, a promise, an unbreakable vow to myself to start living and achieving all that can be achieved. No more imagining projects that may or may not change the world.  No more surprising my creativity because what I dreamt up might not work out. No more waiting, time to start doing.

Due to my vow, I have created this space to let my mind run wild. To skip aimlessly into controversial topics and stumbling back giggling, to delve into questioning humanity and all it stands for, to think outside the box and to work freely, embracing every god damn moment of daily life that graces me.

Welcome to The Human Box,

I hope you enjoy the ride.